


EDNOS - The Story of a Teen Suffering

by StaticNightmares



Category: The Desolate Empire
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-01
Updated: 2019-06-02
Packaged: 2020-04-05 23:16:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19050487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StaticNightmares/pseuds/StaticNightmares
Summary: A tale of a 14-year-old female who doesn't fit the usual standards for anorexia nervosa or bulimia nervosa; but still shows all the physical and psychological symptoms.A true story recount of my own battles with EDNOS; a diagnosed eating disorder for those who still suffer psychologically but do not fit the physical requirements for anorexia nervosa and bulimia nervosa.This is in no way any kind of diary; I am using an OC to recount my journey.





	1. Prologue

 

It's funny, isn't it?

People have to fit a certain standard; a certain requirement for a certain illness to be taking place within their body because all the doctors do is work from the text books. Your BMI is 0.2 over the average diagnosis? You don't have anorexia nervosa; you're fine! Go see a psychiatrist and you'll be all good!

And you have to follow what they say because they're the doctor, right? They know what's best for your health, best for your mentality. If they say you're okay, then you must be alright and it's all in your head, I guess. 

 _ **Anorexia Nervosa;**  _ _is a serious physical and mental health condition. People suffering with Anorexia Nervosa usually have highly distorted body images, thinking they are overweight and fat when in reality they are skinny and underweight. These victims tend to skip meals and/or exercise too much, which results in them beginning to starve themselves to death._

_**Bulimia Nervosa;** is a serious physical and mental condition. People suffering with Bulimia Nervosa usually also have distorted body images like victims who suffer with Anorexia Nervosa do. They often think they're overweight when in reality they are underweight. These victims might exercise a lot, but this condition is mostly characterised by the fact that victims will eat and eat and eat throughout the day and then purge it all up afterwards. This meaning that they force themselves to puke and throw it all back up._

I've done my own research; I know there is something wrong with me. I'm not healthy. My mindset isn't healthy. And yet everyone passes it off as teenage hormones when I know it's something more. 

While I disagree with him prescribing me antidepressants and making me take them, he knows that, in my head, something is wrong. 

And last week, he diagnosed me with EDNOS.

_**EDNOS;** stands for 'eating disorder not otherwise specified' and it is also now referred to as OSFED (other specified feeding and eating disorder). These victims show symptoms and signs of Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia Nervosa but do not have the physical requirements or every single behaviour of the standards that those eating disorders specify. _

It has been hell. Both to realise the truth and accept the fact that I do have an eating disorder that exists. For a 14-year-old, it's hard to admit that you are suffering; and even more so that you've been suffering without realising you have been for years.

So... This is the story of a teenage girl; for a deep understanding of what struggles people with EDNOS go through...


	2. Just As Young

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The tale of how young this problem really started.

**11.**

It was a bright day a few days before summer vacation. Sarah had switched schools a week prior and she had settled in alright; she had made a few friends. Granted not a lot, but she has never been the most sociable girl or person there is, especially due to her low-functioning autism which constantly effected her compatibility with other kids. Even making one friend had been a large success for her and she was proud of herself for the accomplishment she had been able to achieve. While all good things must come to an end, she truly believed she had found the people who would stay by her side at least until she graduated. 

She had been wrong.

It had started with a few jokes. A few "harmless" jokes in which everybody thought was funny at first. Even Sarah thought the comments and jokes about her weight and height and appearance were funny; it was just banter, right? It wasn't as bad as people thought is was... at first. It wasn't until their tone and their words began to take a darker, more hateful turn that it began to effect her and her emotions. As the words got harsher, and the teasing turned into hate comments about her sexuality, about her gender, about her weight, her height, her name, her hair, her eyes, her lips... That was when she realised that these people had no longer been her friends; they had turned into bullies that wanted nothing but to make her life a living hell. So she disassociated herself with those people, and instead continued on her own.

Though recently... Teachers and other students had begun to notice Sarah arriving to school more lethargic. She didn't seem as happy and as bubbly. She didn't pay as much attention in class as she used to, and she often gazed at some of the slimmer girls in longing or in awe. Students had also reported seeing the young girl skipping lunch, not lining up in the cafeteria cue and simply sitting there with a bottle of water sat directly in front of her as she took a sip occasionally. While this behaviour certainly raised concerns to the staff of the small school, every time asked she simply shrugged it off as a, "I ate earlier." or a "I'm not really hungry." And the staff left it alone until the concern was raised again.

It was the same at home; she would shrug it off as she wasn't hungry, and she would promise her parents that she would grab something to eat before she went to bed.

And then she never did grab anything to eat.

And then the process repeated itself.

* * *

 

Sarah sat at the school lunch table, her eyes dropping ever so slowly as her sleep deprivation began to creep up on her and pull her under the comfort of darkness that she had grown all too accustomed to. Her lips were chapped, her stomach churning in a desperate plea for it's holder to take at least a bite of a piece of food so it could digest it and supply her body with the appropriate nutrients that she needed. She hadn't in days, and her body was slowly shutting down on her. She was only 11; and yet this was just as big of a problem for her as it was for any teenager or any adult. Though no one seemed to notice the problem.

Once again, she didn't have a plate of food in front of her. Her small water bottle sat directly in front of her, but she didn't drink from it despite her lips and throat feeling so chapped and dry. She instead stared at her thighs, and the lack of the gap between them both upset her. She pinched the large amount of skin between two of her fingers and moved it around, and the sight of the skin flapping and jiggling around upset her deeply. 

Her hair dropped against her face, hiding her pale skin and tired eyes. A million questions raced through her head as she tried to think and come up with new ways to lose a large amount of weight in a short time. 

"Maybe if not eating at all isn't working..." She said aloud to herself, "Puking up whatever is left inside of me would help me as well...?" She tilted her head as she sighed softly.

This is how it all started; age 11. Over some stupid banter that unfortunately turned sour...


End file.
